still questioning whether i lost the love of my life or my sanity. hmm.
a stroke of your love is like a stroke of life.
what do you do when the person you’re in love with says you’re no good for them. when they say they don’t understand what you’ve ever done for them. someone who once told you they loved you unconditionally now questions if that love ever existed. you would think as adults we’d figure out what love is but nah. i still i have no clue. i just know that i get this feeling with this person that doesn’t exist with anyone else. i wish i knew what that feeling was. i think its love because it brings out the most genuine feelings out of me. this person brings out feelings that arent there for most of the people in my life. people tell you all the time to “do what makes you happy” right? to what extent should you stick to your happiness? what if your happiness comes with a lot of arguments and hard times. is it worth it? or are you supposed to be completely happy all the time. see what i don’t understand is my loved ones tell me that if someone isn’t making you happy you leave them. or they don’t belong in your life so you should dump them in the nearest river. but not everyone who comes into your life can only provide you happiness. some people provide you pain and anger to make you a better person. so why is that we should only surround ourselves with people who continuously make us happy. it sounds like artificial happiness to me. sometimes i question whether or not a certain relationship/ friendship is healthy for me or not. i think we all do it just to protect ourselves and feelings. but suddenly i don’t mind not protecting myself from getting hurt. i want to love a person to my full potential and hold nothing back. i want to fully endure sadness when it comes my way just because we are human. we have feelings. shouldn’t we be emotional and not so restricted and scared from the world? im willing to embrace sadness and love and happiness. the question is if its healthy or not. how much grief is too much?